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I am predominantly a visual Artist and poet, but although great works of Art have brought me to tears only music brings me to ecstasy - I mean equivalent in intensity, 'pain' and passion to sexual ecstasy. I like quite a range of genres of music, many pieces bringing me to tingles or tears, but it is only some music of the Western classical tradition that can bring me such transcendental states. I am Bipolar and I admit that sometimes the beauty of nature brings me to this state, but certain passages of music can do it again and again in all but the lowest of moods.

I'm no longer willing to pay the price in passive aggression, anxiety, violence, manipulation, destructive games, dismantling of personality that seem to accompany 'meaningful' sexual relations. The ecstasy provided by some classical music compares very favourably to the best another human being can give me, the rest in the form of good company being provided by myself, my cats and a close circle of friends.

I wondered if anyone else has found this, or perhaps visual art can do it for you?
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BendySky Featured By Owner Jul 27, 2014  Professional Traditional Artist
visual art and music both stimulate me into my highest states, occasionally theatre or stage productions and cinema also...
i think the "attachment" component of romantic love is the mistake. the addictive aspect is what ruins it and we need to watch out for and its where all the fears and aggressions stem from i believe. real love is about setting people free. i had a relationship like this once - we loved each other deeply and we didnt try to control each other, it was one of the most beautiful things i ever experienced. as the attachments and control started to creep in, of course the love faded.  but it gives me hope, faith, actually a sense of "knowing" that such things are possible.
chesya Featured By Owner Jul 28, 2014
I think it's marvellous that you found such a beautiful relationship, but I have a deep aversion to romantic relationships - notwithstanding negative and/or psychotic states, I'm OK. If there is some special person out there,  they'd have to put on a pretty good show!
DrowningInColours Featured By Owner Jun 28, 2014  Hobbyist General Artist
Yes, I know what you mean but for some time now it isn't that strong anymore. I realized that relationships and basic needs come all before art and music and even thinking. It is all perceived so cloudy when those basic needs aren't satisfied. You can't feel that 100 per cent then and it is likely that apathy kicks in.

What leads you to the thought in the second passage? Does this also refer to love?
chesya Featured By Owner Jun 29, 2014
Love is awkward to pin down. I think that I feel it for most of those close to me. I also hope I feel it in the sense of the apparent mis-translation of Paul in Corinthians (I may have the faith to move mountains, it if I hath not love I am nothing, etc) - this how I would love humanity and the glories of 'creation' if I knew what I was doing or feeling.

Romantic love excludes me on three counts: -

I have have endured appallingly abusive relationships which have predisposed me to cynicism

I suffer from bipolar which with me predisposes me to 'falling in infatuation' with intense chagrin d'amour. I was in a French clinic at the time I was made aware of this as part of an illness and therefore something I could work on.

'Love' or a component of love is therefore almost cured by the right medication, so I no longer have to endure it.

I am so happy to be relieved of the burden of romantic love.
Kuume Featured By Owner Jun 17, 2014  Hobbyist General Artist
I think a lot of my most intense imaginations have always been connected to music... Some of my favourite artists evoke such wistful living landscapes that it's almost unbearable. I think music can sync you with the vital, organic and creative force of nature that decomposes old patterns to give birth to new images. It's always there, even if all else fails.
chesya Featured By Owner Jun 17, 2014
Yes, yes, I sometimes feel like a pupa dissolving tissue ready to be made into something new!
Kuume Featured By Owner Jun 17, 2014  Hobbyist General Artist
Yeah, indeed!
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Submitted on
June 17, 2014